I also have been in similar situation as yourself, as poster below too; it is devastating to the psyche when a spouse has no desire to work on a marriage, this is not how or Whom Jesus Is though, so do not loose faith.
The Lord God Is Faithful, HE Is our Eternal Spouse. True friends & loved ones are honest & supportive, they do not desire to fight or cause dissension in relationships. Love is powerful, healing, good, it moves us forward in life. There are those that are born with inability to love, commit ongoing. Never loose faith in HIM, or yourself, that you are worthy of God's Salvation, His Love, stability with the friendships of those that genuinely care for & about you.
I experienced a marriage that was wrought early on with trouble because the man I married did not care at all about me but for himself, though he professed love, his hard was waxed cold. Do not allow this lie of dissent to move you from your path with Jesus Christ. There are wonderful people in the world, & genuine friends. Move toward The Light of Christ. I pray for your healing & continued support. God Bless.

(05-15-2011 09:41 AM)JW123 Wrote:  Ronjs - I want you to know that I have walked the walk you have. I know the terrible depression that strikes through all of this. I remember sifting through all my husbands stuff to find evidence (but he was SO good at hiding it all), eventually my pastor got it out of him. He promised to stop - I caught them together. I nearly went crazy, insane, up, down, anger, sadness, begging, pleading, it was too terrible and so i understand. Ron please seek Godly council from your Church or through a Christian counsellor soon ok. Satan can use this situation to destroy you and we know he comes to lie, cheat and STEAL so FIGHT BACK. God knows what your wife has or has not done. HE will judge you and he will protect you too. Ronjs, it is hard but while you have a right to divorce her due to adultery, Christ calls us to forgive and seek reconcilliation. Focus on YOU right now, focus on being the Godly husband that Christ calls you to be. Dont focus on her and what she has done. Focus on YOU. Pray for her, and as hard as it is pray for the other man (believe me this was HARD for me to do - but I would not let her have anymore power over me) and Ronjs, BELIEVE, BELIEVE in the power of God. I will pray for you ok. May God protect your heart. AMEN.

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typo: I meant to say my ex husband's heart was waxed cold/ his heart was hard & not seemingly malliable. He was a very angry & controlling man who decieved me horribly. I am however surrounded by those that do care now, & have no desire to fight or cause chaos in my life. Loss is difficult however you are better to get the help you need as God Is Light, & Shines Through the darkness.
Take care.

(05-17-2011 04:10 AM)Guest Wrote:  I also have been in similar situation as yourself, as poster below too; it is devastating to the psyche when a spouse has no desire to work on a marriage, this is not how or Whom Jesus Is though, so do not loose faith.
The Lord God Is Faithful, HE Is our Eternal Spouse. True friends & loved ones are honest & supportive, they do not desire to fight or cause dissension in relationships. Love is powerful, healing, good, it moves us forward in life. There are those that are born with inability to love, commit ongoing. Never loose faith in HIM, or yourself, that you are worthy of God's Salvation, His Love, stability with the friendships of those that genuinely care for & about you.
I experienced a marriage that was wrought early on with trouble because the man I married did not care at all about me but for himself, though he professed love, his hard was waxed cold. Do not allow this lie of dissent to move you from your path with Jesus Christ. There are wonderful people in the world, & genuine friends. Move toward The Light of Christ. I pray for your healing & continued support. God Bless.

(05-15-2011 09:41 AM)JW123 Wrote:  Ronjs - I want you to know that I have walked the walk you have. I know the terrible depression that strikes through all of this. I remember sifting through all my husbands stuff to find evidence (but he was SO good at hiding it all), eventually my pastor got it out of him. He promised to stop - I caught them together. I nearly went crazy, insane, up, down, anger, sadness, begging, pleading, it was too terrible and so i understand. Ron please seek Godly council from your Church or through a Christian counsellor soon ok. Satan can use this situation to destroy you and we know he comes to lie, cheat and STEAL so FIGHT BACK. God knows what your wife has or has not done. HE will judge you and he will protect you too. Ronjs, it is hard but while you have a right to divorce her due to adultery, Christ calls us to forgive and seek reconcilliation. Focus on YOU right now, focus on being the Godly husband that Christ calls you to be. Dont focus on her and what she has done. Focus on YOU. Pray for her, and as hard as it is pray for the other man (believe me this was HARD for me to do - but I would not let her have anymore power over me) and Ronjs, BELIEVE, BELIEVE in the power of God. I will pray for you ok. May God protect your heart. AMEN.