RE: overwhelmed by life and want to give up- pray for me
Hi,
This is a long thread and I haven't read through all the posts but I just want to say that I've suffered, I mean really suffered, with long term anxiety and depression. For years like yourself. (about 5 years). Those days were dark. One thing I never let go of was my faith in God, sometimes it crumbled almost away but I always knew that God was there, willing me on, loving me, and that one day it would get better. God offers us hope. Hope for a purpose driven life, hope beyond death. Please hold on to that hope.
Please ask God to help you find the purpose he wants you to have. Please no matter what happens remember that suicide is a permenant solution to a temporary problem. I felt like giving up, giving up on everyone, giving up on life, God, the lot. I saw no way out.
I wish I could pinpoint what 'happened' to make me better, but I cannot.
All I know is that God cried with me when i cried, he hurt when I hurt, he picked me up when I fell over, he cleansed me when I felt dirty, he carries my sin for me so I am free. I know that, even though I honestly could not see a light to the end of the tunnel, somehow... somehow... a few years later... I am SO grateful that I did not take my life. That I kept what little faith I had in God. That in those dark hours I would always turn to him, he may not have answered my prayer how I would have envisaged, things may not have gotten obviously 'better'... but looking back how my life has turned out... there WAS a light at the end of the tunnel. And the way things were... I know God had a plan for me, through all the pain, I love my life now, I love the people in it, the things I do and I know none of this would have been possible if I'd chosen the path I, my mum, my teachers, my friends would have wanted for me. Life doesn't always turn out how we want, it can take the direct opposite direction. But in the end - God was there every single second for me... and now I am truly grateful for I know those dark times, God was working in me, he was doing something in me... and it brought me to where I am, who I am, the people I know, today. None of this would have been possible if my life had been more conventional - job, health etc.
God loves you. God wants what's best for you. Know this. (it may seem hard to accept now, but do trust in him) Keep praying, and perhaps find someone in your local church you can trust to talk through how you're feeling, just someone to go through your day/week.
I pray that you will feel God's love, peace and protection surrounding you. I pray that you turn for him for guidance in your life. I thank God for creating you and I pray he blesses your life with riches you cannot measure.
God Bless you ,
x
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