After being a Christian for 25 years, it is with much sadness and regret that I have lost interest in my salvation.
Not once has God blessed me with long-lasting joy and happiness. Most of my major prayers have gone unanswered, the exact opposite came to pass and everything that could possibly gone wrong has gone wrong in my life.
Sometimes God takes extremely long to answer my prayers and when the answer finally comes, it's taken away from me abruptly within a short time, leaving me in shock and in a much worse state than I was before. All these happened despite my fasting and prayers for God's protection.
It doesn't make sense to me look forward to Heaven some day when life on earth is a like a living hell.
I am asking for prayers from everyone reading this - please pray for God's Grace and Mercy upon me. That He will not drive me away and push me to another god and another religion. I'm desperate and I do not know what else to do.
Pray with me that God will restore the JOY of my salvation and also RESTORE everything else that I've lost - my marriage, my house, my money, my health and my dignity.
I'm desperate and I want to be able to understand Him as a God of LOVE and Grace. Why does He let me suffer so much if He claims to love me? It doesn't make sense to me. 25 years is a long time and I'm tempted to call it quits but I pray that God will somehow stop me if He really loves me.