Please listen, friend. God knows the beginning from the end. Every moment of your life, every movement of your heart, every thought that would pass through your mind, He knew all of these things before you were even born and yet He still calls out to you. He still loves you and wants you to come to Him, not for judgement or punishment but for rest and peace. He's not suprised by anything you do, anything you think or anything you feel. He's not shocked or disappointed or dismayed.

God has given you a lifetime on this earth to sort these things out and He wants to walk through these struggles with you. Give Him the chance.