I cannot sleep... I've been up since 5am... and it's not even a school day. I just couldn't stop thinking about him... my love... my (ex)boyfriend... Goodness, for him to be so close... he's right there... and I'm right here...

I had a long... long talk with God earlier... my parents are asleep... I'm the only one awake right now... I've walked around my room... peeked inside my parents room... they are sleeping soundly... I walked to the kitchen window... looked out and up at the dark and cloudy morning sky... then walked to the living room... and sat down on the couch... and had a long 1 hour talk with God about how much I really really want this unity... this restoration to happen... I cried... I wept... and after that long talk and confessions and the like... I'm really hoping that God will understand me and He heard me... and I hope... he can give me and my (ex)boyfriend one more chance... and let that chance go on forever into marriage... I still remember those dreams oh so well. and I want them to happen too... only him... and no one else...

I really don't know what else to say here... I already had my long talk with God about my heart's desires... really trusting in Him to grant them... this one being the most prominent one I have... Please keep me in your prayers... I only slept for 4 hours... and I feel like I can't sleep anymore. And guys thank you for still being there for me... even though I'm working your nerves a little posting over and over again in a day... Please keep praying. Really need it right now...

~Mel-S