Just been informed that the birth father of my foster children will be taking custody next month. I just want to die. I have raised these boys since birth and now they will be ripped from our home to live with someone the social worker deemed unfit to take care of children. These are my Christmas babies. I always felt they were my gifts from God after all these years of struggling to start a family. My pastor once told me that God gives us opportunities each day to do for him and that we constantly say no. I wanted only 1 child and a girl. When they agency called, my husband and I were their last family to call before they were going to separate the twins. I felt that we were saying yes to God, that he was asking us to take these boys so they wouldn't be separated. My reward for my good deed is that my children are being taken away and we are left with nothing. We will not be taking in any more children because we were told most likely these children will be In Care again and can only be placed with me if I have space for them. My only choice is to wait for them to come home even if it takes years. Maybe I'm just venting because I don't even know what to pray for any more. It feels like I'm dying.I guess pray for a miracle.