I was reborn and transformed by christ in 1995. Since then I have done nothing but steam roll down hill. Jesus I thought you would heal me! Jesus I thought you would provide. Jesus I thought you would cause me to be able to provide for myself. Jesus I thought I would be in your hands. Jesus Why didnt you send someone to tell me that I would have to work at my continued healing when that really mattered? Why didn't you send me a teacher out of all that I sought out to tell me the truth? Why did you send me only teachers who promised me you would prosper and heal me when I am blessed with food but not even enough healing to care for myself? Jesus Why did you let me down? Jesus why is my self esteem dead my spirit dying and my strength to fight gone? Jesus why do I want to die because I cant live with my incompetency anymore? Jesus why do I have a husband that doesn't want me? Jesus why do your children keep telling me that you will fix everything when you wont and accuse me of not being saved or born again because I feel this way? Why aren't you hearing me when my soul is screaming but my mouth is silent?You show me that I am indeed a worm and my waiting on you is what destroys me.

NEW STRENGHTH
ISAIAH 40:31
"YET THOSE WHO WAIT FOR THE LORD WILL GAIN NEW STRENGTH; THEY WILL MOUNT UP WITH WINGS LIKE EAGLES, THEY WILL RUN AND NOT GET TIRED, THEY WILL WALK AND NOT BECOME WEARY."

SYREN I have been where you are in all ways ***if you could would you please go to the message I put on the site early this morning IT IS CALLED ME MY** NAME IS abbie after you read it let me know if you want to talk to me I would be more than willing to share what I have learned in these last 33 years and understand THE LORD FINALLY GOT THROUGH TO ME EARLY THIS MORNING IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO SEE WHAT WAS KILLING ME***MAYBE.. JUST MAYBE THE TIMING WAS JUST FOR YOU TOO*****PLEASE READ IT

Syren, Jesus never promised us an easy road, he promised he would be with us, sometimes I feel hopeless but I know my Lord has always stretched his hand out to pull me from the pit, please don't give up, be still and watch your husband life does change, life does change I am 57 years old and God has held me in his hands since I was around eight years old, if I wrote a book on my life no one would ever believe me, I know the truth and the truth can only be found walking with the father, Jesus does listen to us and sometimes he doesn't answer quickly, maybe he wants us to gain from the strenghts within he has given us, I always say he is like the riddler in batman, he sure must have a sense of humor because sometimes I have a real diffcult time getting it right. Do not give up or give in he has already given us his promises, it written in his word. his book of life. just ask it may come today or maybe not for sometime but he does fulfill every promise he has given us. I pray your heart and eyes become opened and that God touches you as you sleep tonight, jesus speaks his love in your ears. in Jesus name Amen!

Thanks to all of you who responded. I have nothing left to do but wait. God hasn't taken me out yet!

Syren God has a purpose for your life he is not going to take you out! I know in the natural this seems difficult but in the spiritual word you will understand, he has a plan for you life believe I
am a living testimony to him and what he can do, turn you hurts to him you will get through. I pray and ask for peace over you. IN JEsus name Amen.