(06-28-2011 03:12 AM)LostSoul Wrote:  I've spent the past years investigating my beliefs and faith, deconstructing , reconstructing, and testing them.

I used to believe Jesus was my savior, heaven waited for me, how could it be otherwise, the holy spirit's presence in my life could be literally felt.

What I now believe has been profoundly disturbing, not in it's self, but in the net destabilizing effect on my psyche. You might ask, what do I believe? I believe our ancestors created the "God concept" as a mirror image of the self, an imaginary being having the perfect attributes we seek to embrace. Virtues being hard to exercise in a chaotic and overwhelming world, God is the steadfast guardian who stands up to all challenges and prevails. In summary I believe wise men formulated religion as an ancient system of psychotherapy for the masses and as such Jesus is a fraud assuming he's not entirely made up. I believe the holy spirit as typically experienced is merely an catharsis, or release, induced by thoughts of admiration, sympathy, sorrow, love, and forgiveness.

This absence of God has left a large vacume in my life, as I now stand in an empty hall, my will is a vector pointing in any and no direction.

How did you feel when God was in your life and How do you feel now that you have not let him in your life and you dont believe? What are the diffrences?