Hi all~~

Up until a few months ago I was working two jobs: a full time day and a part time evening job. Was doing that for about a year and a half. The part time job was moved to another state, then I lost the full time job last week [because of an Administrative thing which had absolutely nothing to do with my job performance or anything of the kind], two days before Thanksgiving. Hehe, two jobs now NO JOB. Unbelievable. I have less than $400 to my name and unemployment insurance is NOT available. Rent is due this Saturday, 1 Dec. I simply won't have enough for that, not to mention no money for food, fuel, truck payment/ insurance, etc. Believe me, the thought of suicide seems to be my only 'solution.' Resumes have been sent all over the place.

I know that He will provide for all my needs and that He's also promised that He would never leave nor forsake me. I'm in a position where I have absolutely no choice but to trust Him. But the thought of suicide...

I beg for whoever reads this to please pray on my behalf. I'm asking for one excellent paying job that is very long term; I don't want to have two jobs. Also, that any background/credit/whatever else checks, drug tests, etc., are all passed with green lights. I'm asking for this job to come through QUICKLY. I have NO money to speak of except for partial rent payment. And I can't believe that my God cannot provide for His own.

I approached my own parents and they are unable to help me out; they are poor, and have managed to stay married 40+ years. While sobbing, I mentioned that I wished I was never born; that I should be helping THEM out financially, but am unable to. You can imagine the sheer grief my mother felt.

This may or may not sound desperate, but I am desperate and feel so helpless. Please let me not turn to suicide as my solution as this would be extremely disgraceful and a major slap in the face of My Creator.

Thank you.