I need help finding direction in my life. I have commited error after error and continue to hurt those around me including my children. I left my husband for another man twice my age because I was ill and my husband was gone. He has treated me like a queen but I don't love him. I have tried time and time again to play the role for the sake of my children. But, he sees the farce and it causes him to get furious. Its gotten to the point that I'm scared of the consequences if I leave, I'm scared of what the future holds. He is so angry and wants to take revenge for me not loving him "the right way". I have gone to church when arguments permit, but I just can't seem to find faith.