Demi
4 CHRIST
Posts: 27
Joined: Oct 2010
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I AM PUTTING ALL MY DIRT OUT THERE. NOW LET'S SEE WHO WILL HELP ME FIGHT IT IN PRAYER
I POSTED UP HERE HOW I FOUND OUT LAST WEEK SOME THINGS THAT MY DEAR HUSBAND DONE TO ME THAT HURT ME 2 MONTHS AGO. WHAT I DID NOT SHARE WAS THAT HE WAS BEGGING FOR MY FORGIVENESS AND I TURNED MY BACK ON HIM AS IF HE WAS NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO FORGIVE ME. GOD REVEALED THAT UGLY SIDE ABOUT ME TO ME AND IT BROKE ME DOWN. ITS HARD WHEN GOD SHOW YOU YOURSELF. YOU BEG AND PLEAD FOR HIM TO COVER YOU FROM THE HANDS OF THE ENEMY WHEN THE ENEMY THAT WE ARE ASKING GOD TO HIDE US FROM IS YOURSELF. SO IN TURN HE HAS TO COVER YOU FROM YOURSELF. SO MANY TIMES AND SO MANY MORE TIMES THAT I AM GOING TO HAVE TO GO TO MY FATHER AND BEG FORGIVENESS AND I EXPEXT FOR HIM TO FORGIVE ME BUT I CAN'T FORGIVE MY HUSBAND. THE NERVE OF ME. I ASKED GOD ABOUT 2 TO 3 MONTHS AGO TO CONCENCRATE ME. I SAID, "GOD! HERE I AM! DO WHAT YOU WANT WITH ME. BREAK ME ALL THE WAY DOWN AND REBUILD ME!" I PRAYED THAT PRAYER FOR THE LONGEST. NOT REALIZING THAT WAS ALL GOD WAS DOING TO ME WAS WHAT I ASKED. MY HUSBAND AND I ALWAYS HAD ISSUES WITH TRUST AND IN ORDER FOR ME TO CONTINUE ON IN MY BREAK DOWN PROCESS, THERE WERE SOMETHINGS THAT I HAD TO FACE, DEAL WITH, AND WALK AWAY FROM. YEA! I WAS HURT! I WAS MAD! FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS, I EVEN TOOK ME SOME DRINKS BECAUSE I WANTED TO SLEEP AWAY THE PAIN. I FELT LIKE IF I DIDN'T THINK ABOUT IT, THEN I WOULD BE FINE. BUT THEN I WOKE UP! GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY!!! I WOKE UP TO THAT SAME OLD DEVILISH DEMON THAT OH SLICK LUCIFER WAS TRYING TO DESTROY ME WITH. I STOPPED READING MY WORD FOR A FEW DAYS! I STOP PRAYING FOR A FEW DAYS! I BECAME MEAN AND WANTED TO CURSE AND FIGHT MY HUSBAND! I WAS TURNING INTO NOT ONLY A NASTY WOMAN BUT THE TYPE WOMAN THE ENEMY WANTED ME TO BE. I TRIED TO FIGHT MY HUSBAND AND HE SAID ENOUGH AND HE IS NOW THREATNING TO LEAVE ME AND OUR KIDS. THEN GOD HAD SOMEONE TO TELL ME THAT I HAD TO GO THROUGH THIS IN ORDER TO GET TO WHERE GOD WANTS ME TO BE. I NEVER KNEW A TRIP COULD BE SO PAINFUL. THEN GOD STARTED TO SHOW ME MY WRONG! YEA MY HUSBAND MAY HAE DONE THIS 2 MONTHS AGO AND HE MAY HAVE SAID THAT BUT GOD SAID, "NO! WE DEALING WITH YOU NOW!" I DON'T EXCUSE HIM FOR WHAT HE DID BUT I NEED TO SHOW YOU WHERE YOU ERRORED IN ME! YOU KNEW MY WORD! YOU LABORED IN ME! YOU PRAYED TO ME! AND AS SOON AS THINGS GOT TO MUCH FOR YOU, YOU LEANED ON EMOTIONS RATHER THEN ALL THE THINGS THAT I BEEN SPEAKING INTO YOU. I BEEN SPEAKING LIFE AND YOU ALLOWED THE ENEMY TO COME IN AND SPEAK DEATH!"
BUT WHAT A MIGHTY GOD WE SERVE! I ASKED FOR FORGIVENESS FROM GOD! THEN I WENT TO ASK FOR FORGIVENESS FROM MY HUSBAND. HE IS STILL MAD AT ME AND REFUSING TO TALK BUT I TRUST GOD! NO MATTER WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, I TRUST GOD.
I KNOW THAT GOD ADORES THE VERY THOUGHT OF MARRIAGE AND I KNOW THAT HE WILL WORK THIS THING OUT IN MY FAVOR. I KNOW THAT RIGHT NOW I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO SEE MY WAY BUT I TRUST GOD.
HERE IS WHAT I AM ASKING. I AM ASKING FOR A FEW GOOD PEOPLE THAT KNOW HOW TO GET A WORD TO GOD FOR WE KNOW IN HIS WORD HE SAYS, WHERE 2 OR THREE ARE GATHERED IN MY NAME, THERE I WILL BE IN THE MIDST. SO ALL I NEED IS TWO OR THREE THAT WOULD JOIN WITH ME IN PRAYER THAT GOD NOT ONLY SAVE MY HUSBAND BUT FOR HIM TO RESTORE IT TO NEW. NOT JUST MY MARRIAGE BUT ALL BROKEN MARRIAGES THAT ARE OUT HERE SUFFERING. LETS PRAY THAT GOD WILL STEP IN AND DO THE UNTHINKABLE FOR THESE MARRAIGES THAT ARE SUFFERING.
PLEASE PRAY THAT MY HUSBAND WILL FORGIVE ME. PLEASE PRAY THAT GOD WILL DEAL WITH HIS HEART ACCORDINGLY THE SAME WAY THAT HE DEALT AND IS DEALING WITH MINE. PLEASE PRAY THAT GOD WILL TOUCH HIS HEART ONLY THE WAY HE CAN TOUCH IT. ALSO PRAY THAT MY HUSBAND IS ABLE TO BUY HIS OWN DUMP TRUCK. HE IS CURRENTLY UNEMPLOYED. PRAY THAT GOD BLESS US TO BE LENDERS AND NOT BORROWERS.
ONE LAST BUT SPECIAL REQUEST. YOU REMEMBER THE STORY WHERE JACOB WAS WRESTLING WITH THE ANGEL AND THE ANGEL DEMANDED HIM TO LET HER GO BUT JACOB REFUSED AND SAID I WANT TILL YOU BLESS ME. I PRAY THAT I HAVE THAT SAME FIGHTING SPIRIT.
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| 10-06-2010 11:08 AM |
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