I understand how you feel. Now that you have declared what you want I pray God will bring it about. You may have felt you wasted years, but God works all things together for good for those who love Him, Romans 8:28 It seems you have a strong dependency on God which is a good start for a relationship
I am a woman in my fifties and and though I had amazing years and joy with The Lord, I also had sadness, anxiety and a broken heart which was such a trigger for me it knocked me for years. Now I look back and feel at times I wasted years but I was so shook that I could not get past it. But I believe God did a work on me
I feel much stronger now so I am now praying about location, church, work and finally a date! As a woman, I hope that The Lord will also bring a child into my life even as a spiritual mother, as it's too late for me biologically. All things are possible with God! He can still fulfill motherly and fatherly desires in a different way. I have now a spring in my step and hope. Somebody gave me very wise advice when I was broken. To give back. When I stepped out and helped the needy my joy was restored and my youth was renewed like the eagle. Once I took a trip away for a week and God gave me so much refreshment that it was like being away for a year, He stretched out the days and uplifted me So much that when I returned my house looked strange, it felt like I had a years holidays. So God can give you back the years you lost. God's ways are not our ways. One of the things that might stop it coming to pass is if our of time on earth is up, but that means we are going to eternal joy and fulfillment anyway where these desires will be fulfilled. So onwards and upwards Christian soldier!