I pray that you will let God heal your pain that he is the one who can help you get through this...I am going through a simular situation myself for the past year I did try to kill myself I'm very lucky to be here today, it looks bad right now but let God have it you can pray for your husband, I'll pray for him to, but you need to take care of you... I know God has a plan for all of us and sometimes it not what we want so I pray that you will walk with GOD and let him heal your heart...