today i have been going through a hard i lost 58.00 in the store that hurt me and made me mad i feel like im losing more than i am being blessed i feel like in the church im in i feel like im not wanted or welcomed cause it has been an issue with my attire i like to wear pants i used to be a tomboy i wear dresses and skirts every now and again but it has been a point where they only want to acknowledge me when im doing what they want but noone knows the things im battling with these mood swings and downward spirals cause i feel lost in the world im trying to figure out why am i feeling cursed i feel like i am cursed where i cant save im kind of the back bone of the family but i feel like im at a stand still i feel that everyone looks to me but i dont even know my purpose i feel like im at a stand still and i just want to grow im fustrated and i feel like god hates me