Im losing my grip on my sanity I am trying to hold it together, I've been hospitalized twice before because of mental break downs. I am in college now and I'm struggling to pay for school my transportation to and from school I work a minimum age job can't come across anything that pays better thats legal. my family is dysfunctional a ex con step dad with a serious cocaine addiction and my mother who will fund him before she feeds us. I am 21 year old female doing everything to get out of this home I went away to college even but I had to come back home because I could not afford to take out any more loans in my cosigners name. I am so emotionally drained that I feel ill, my heart is giving me chest pains constantly crying always stressing about money and how to get out and how i am going to cope when school comes back in session. I am so terribly miserable we are a family of 8 6 kids all have different fathers living in a 2 bedroom apartment in a bad area in NY, there are mice bed bugs and roaches infested in this apartment building it is pure hell living here , what ever I work for it is stolen never any food, i have anxiety and depression, so hard to maintain any friends due to how my family situation is it is so embarrassing I try to counter act it but i am oppressed daily. Sometimes I don't eat well And i notice changes in my health I can't deal with this any more I have one more year of school I still need text books i used my credit card to purchase them I'm not even making enough to pay them off in time!, I'm trying to find a way out thinking of even a homeless shelter I've lived in one before it was so traumatic i am scared to go back there but living here is really getting to me. I need a way out I just want to live somewhere where I feel safe , where it is warm where I can study peacefully and not have to be attacked my rodents. I just turned 21 In my 4th year of college I am really trying hard to make it but I need help Im so tired of this my whole life with this dysfunctional family I don't want to ever see them again! I don't know what to do! please pray that i can have a way out PLEASE I can't deal with this any more.

Jesus is the only way to everything and especially to the Father. Ask Jesus to help you in your time alone. He is waiting to hear from you.

God, there are others going through such difficulties, others more so than what we are going through. Oh God, please help us focus and see Jesus alone as everything else become shadows. Forgive me, forgive us for complaining, for not asking and using the wisdom You made available for us. For not trusting You enough and being a hypocrite, even before Your eyes. Set us free from our deceitful wants, and truly ask for Your will in our lives. Forgive our forefathers' sins, that carry over to us, at the same time forgive us our own willfull sins. Lord Jesus, hear us. Do not let Your Spirit depart from us.

In Jesus Name i command that all powers of darkness and curses to leave this family and their home ! Now !
I pray that Lord's will be done in their lives. Amen
Psalms 107:20 Amen