I have experienced a lot of abuse in my life. Both my mother and father's families are very narcissistic and abusive. Years ago, I turned away from my faith because I just did not understand why God was not doing something to stop the abuse that I was suffering through. I was also having financial troubles and felt very hopeless. I turned away from God and unfortunately became involved in the new age and also witchcraft. I thought that those things would protect me from the people that had abused me. During that process I kept feeling convicted by the Holy Spirit to walk away from the things that I was doing. I tried to do this, but each time that I did, the people that were harming me got worse and did more and more things to beat me down.

Eventually, I did leave that lifestyle and fully surrender my life to Jesus again but I was dealing with a lot of fear and anxiety. I also dealt with multiple experiences where I was "outed" by people for being involved in the new age and witchcraft which caused me to deal with even more problems and even persecution from the same people that had been targeting me.

I have been living in what feels like a prison for a long time. I have been struggled with OCD and a lot of anxiety. Even though I believe in Jesus, I feel as though I am in spiritual bondage. I am trying to put my foot down and go back to living normally again, but the same individuals that I have been having trouble with have started targeting me again. Whenever they attack me, I feel "spiritually" unsafe. There are a lot of things in my life and walk with God that need to change. There are many "spiritual" experiences that I am still having that I know I should not be having as a Christian and I do not know what to do about it. Please pray for me. I understand that I may sound paranoid or even incoherent but I am not and I know have been experiencing. I have dealt with a lot of judgment and gaslighting from people within the Christian community about this and I am just begging someone to extend real Christlike love toward me and just send up a prayer that my life will change, that God will protect me from the people that have abused me and targeted me and that He will restore my life.

Lord have your perfect will be done in this person's life and their situation. Help them to get closer to you and know that better days are coming their way as long as they give it all to you. Give them your peace and the strength to keep on going until all these problems are gone away. In Jesus mighty name I pray amen.