I desperately want more of the Lord and have periods of deep intimacy with him. However, I also seem to trip up or get entangled in sin that temporarily breaks the fellowship that I have with the Lord and frustrates me tremendously. I am a bit of a perfectionist, so when I fail or fall in my relationship with the Lord, it hurts me terribly and I have a tendency to get really down on myself. Some people say I'm too hard on myself, but I can't help it. I've gone to doctors about it and they've said in the past that it's a chemical imbalance in my brain that causes me to feel so low at times, but I'm not so sure that I believe that. Anyway, I want to know the Lord! I know God's ways are right and I want to follow in those ways. I want to experience all the joys and benefits of walking with him closely and want to follow him perfectly. I know perfection isn't attainable this side of glory, but I guess I'm just saying that I'm serious about my relationship with Christ and need help overcoming a few of my vices that stand in the way of me experiencing great intimacy with the Lord. Thanks in advance for praying.

Okey here we go LORD this person needs to turn themselves completely over to you...get out of that boat and start walking on the water just like spontaneous Peter. Jesus will not do this till hand yourself over to HIM THEN GET READY FOR THE RIDE OF YOUR LIFE AT THE BOOTOM OF HIS FEET ..JESUS WE NEED HELP TO DO THIS HERE WE GO IN JESUS NAME i AM GETTING OUT OF THE BOAT AND I CAN'T SWIM....GULP...GULP LET'S GO IN HIS SERVICE abbie