new beginnings, Confusion is from the enemy as the Bible tells us, so I think you will agree that the tactic of confusion is being used for your harm and not your benefit. Love on the other hand...the Agape variety is from God and is always for our good. So where is the disconnect? You are locked into the longing that comes from EROS love. You did not stop loving him...he stopped loving you in this manner...and it is actually unresolved anger that is leading your heart to be wounded so. Go back and read your own words..."After everything he has done to try to "throw me away" I still love him." You need to change the image in your mind...which only you and God's word can do. As wrong as what he is doing is, he is not throwing you away...he is simply questing after EROS himself. He has made another choice for his own happiness...as selfish as that may be. In his poor twisted mind, one has nothing to do with the other. You are both locked into the clutches of EROS...and for your own peace of mind you have to rise above it. It will take time new beginnings and it may also take some therapeutic work to help you heal. One thing that you can be certain of though...a person who lives only in the stage of EROS love will cheat many times...will change partners many times...because the adhesive that holds the relationship together...spiritual oneness is missing; it never had focus...it was all about how one felt. Feelings are very unreliable...they can change at the drop of a hat...which is why EROS love should not, CANNOT be the basis for marriages if they are to last. Walk back to when you first were dating your husband in your mind...how did the relationship progress? Did it follow God's 3 phases of dating:

Spiritual Oneness-Is this couple of one Spiritual Accord. Did you pray about this relationship individually and together? Did you seek God's plan for you as a couple while dating. This is what God intends.
Mental and Emotional Oneness-Is this couple of one Mental and Emotional Accord? In essence is each one comfortable with the mental processes; the way that they think things through of the other? Is each comfortable with the range of emotion and how love and tenderness is expressed...or does one go without something emotionally so the other can be comfortable?
Marriage Physical Oneness-Sexual relations as husband and wife

Or did the relationship develop based upon feelings? One of the greatest tactics of the enemy is when we are moved to engage in sex before we have worked through the other phases. Once this pleasurable side of the relationship is engaged...the others lose focus and remain under developed. When this happens, the stage where Agape love is developed...phase one never is cultivated as part of the relationship and therefore the adhesive of longevity is not there. Long term relationships cannot live on EROS love alone. While it is a part of the love that makes up a marriage...it cannot be the only element of love if it is to last. My grandmother, who was married to my grandfather for 40 years used to tell us...relationships will end where they begin...in this case either with roots in Agape or roots in EROS. So how does this answer your question...how do you stop loving someone that you have loved for 11 years? The answer is you don't. You transform the love...giving up longing for what is not and what cannot be...to loving as God does unconditionally...one is a feeling...EROs, one is a permanent condition...Agape. Some day if you remain in submission to God...and you do the work to heal your own hurt...you will love your husband for the years you had together...and for the gift of the son he gave you...and nothing more. But you must renew your mind and become the champion of your own healing for this to happen. Consider Christian based therapy...as an option...I found it very helpful when I was coming through this time in my life.

Father, lead new beginnings to a new understanding of love...what it is and what it is not. Let her see her longing for what it is...a desire to have something that is no longer in existence...something that once was but is no more. Help her to understand the words of the old in our culture...you cannot love something for long that does not love back. Help her Father to transfer the love to You for now who are reliable and unchanging and will always return it. Hold her in the palm of your hand that she might heal...and when the time is right and love presents itself again in her life...help her to walk through her dating relationships in the proper order...this time with Spiritual Eyes open and her heart guarded and her feelings in their proper place in the experience. In Jesus name...Amen!